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| User: | zehavit_lamasu (40805) ![Self-committed [paid]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/talk/md10_thumbup.gif){kind=small} "Gadzooks" Ejaculated Sir Andrew...
Velvet and Lace and all that Sin... |
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| Name: | zehavit_lamasu | ||||||||||
| E-mail: | zehavit.lamasu@googlemail.com | ||||||||||
| Bio: | A BIOGRAPHY OF A SMALL AND HAIRY CROSS DRESSING JEW: Lamasu life-long dream was to be a trash novelist. She has been writing trash since she finally figured how to read and write (which took some time) and she still does so with relish, lack of shame and an astonishing capacity for bad grammar and spelling mistakes. Her Beta Readers believe that the day she learns the difference between WERE and WHERE the four riders of the apocalypse would come riding in! Lamasu's stories involve shameless incidents of Mary Sue and random explosions of purple prose that could possibly cause brain-damadge and periods of extended insanity. They mostly involve soap opera style sagas containing Gay Catburglars, Lesbian Sky Pirates, Gay Evil Occultists, Lesbian Assasins and at least one Gay Rabbi... with a Gun! She occasionally insert a straight man or woman into her stories... mostly to keep them realistic... y'know ... so people will... aaah... take her seriously... errr... ^^;;. Lamasu is unpublished. This is partly because she thinks publishers have big teeth they can use to bite stuff like her head... which she is very fond of (her head not the publishers with the teeth). She is currently toying with the idea of self publishing and a selected group of well trained spelling Nazis and grammar monkeys are being exploited over two of her novels over at ![[info]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} temple_tree.Mostly she is unpublished to protect the health and sanity of potential readers (see above). Lamasu has a bad allergy to verbal flatulence. She has been known to nuke people who speak out of their arses from orbit. This led to her getting the sack from many jobs a fact she is proud of almost as much as she is proud of getting the boot out of the Israeli Army for being "Unsuitable to the System". Her response to stupidity comprises of complicated swear word jumble of Hebrew, Arabic and Yiddish. She has a degree in "how to be an unemployed waste of space" AKA - BA in the archaeology and languages of the ancient near east. This led her to be a Belly Dancer by ways of desperation, hunger and love of sparkly things. These days she lives in Glastonbury where she fits in quite well. Content to raise her children, play the flute and watch more Takarazuka than the law permits (or the pocket allows). Can often be spotted reading trashy romance novels in the sun or writing love letters to fabulous Japanese cross dressing ladies! Friend her and she will be glad to friend you back - BUT DO SO AT YOUR OWN RISK. | ||||||||||
| Interests: | 150: 10th kingdom, a rebours, absinthe, achinoam nini, ai no kusabi, akai toreno, akkadian, albrecht durer, alchemy, alcohol marinated anime cock, alice in wonderland, angel sanctuary, anti faltzanut, ao no kiseki, arislan senki, arsène lupin, atheism, aubrey beardsley, ayumi kasai, babylon 5, bagoas, ballantine adult fantasy, balthier, banana fish, battle royale, bellydance, bjd, blackadder, blake's 7, caravaggio, china mieville, chintsubu, chris hunt, christopher marlowe, cirque du soleil, coldfire, corsair, count cain, danny kaye, dante's cove, death note, divine comedy, dresden files, ella fitzgerald, erich kastner, exploding bishounen, firefly, flesh & blood, franziska von karma, from eroica with love, fumi yoshinaga, gabriel knight, gankutsuou, geeking, georgette heyer, gilgamesh, gorgeous carat, gormenghast, gustave dore, h. p. lovecraft, haifa, hebrew poetry, hermeticism, hetalia, his dark materials, homoerotica, howl's moving castle, hudson hawk, indiana jones, inkubus sukkubus, innocent bird, israeli literature, kabalah, kafka, keiko takemiya, kinu sekigushi, koori no mamono, kouyu shurei, kuroshitsuji, kurt halbritter, kushiel, labyrinth, lamento, last exile, legend of galactic heroes, licensed by royal, lions of al-rassan, liu wei, locke lamora, lord solomon fountain, loreena mckennit, love mode, lucifer box, ludwig ii, malice mizer, mamiya oki, mata hari, matendou sonata, meine liebe, meir shalev, mel keegan, mesopotamia, michal negrin, miniature books, moby dick, moka azumi, mononoke, moomintroll, never ending story, night head genesis, ogasawara uki, orientalism, original battlestar galactica, paradise lost, peter f. hamilton, philip marlowe, philip reeve, princess bride, prydain, queen, reduced shakespeare company, ricardo pinto, rocky horror show, roger zelazny, rose of versailles, rufus shinra, sandman, scarlet pimpernel, shadowdance, sherlock holmes, snobs and sodomy, star blazers, takarazuka, the elder scrolls, the etched city, tori maia, trinity blood, utena, valdemar, walt whitman, william blake, wolf's rain, wonderfalls, wraeththu, x/1999, yamane ayano, yami no matsuei, yaoi, yebisu celebrities, 木々 | ||||||||||
| Schools: | None listed | ||||||||||
| Friends: | |||||||||||
| Friend of: | 12: 4ti3k4t35, alice_montrose, deadlydiva, frogspace, jerry_carnival, jyuukoi, kabuki_chan, lovely_evil_one, mercurychaos, skadichan, threeoranges, zehavit_lamasu | ||||||||||
| Member of: | 3: elitist_yaoi, oki_mamiya, premium_users | ||||||||||
| Account type: | Permanently Insane plus Extra Userpics | ||||||||||
